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What happens when an escort in Bangalore grows older? Well, in some cases, they get wiser. These veteran hookers say they are still in the game, and what is more, their clientele is still young.
TODAY, Revathy is in excruciating pain. As she sits awkwardly back on the sofa, covered in an elaborate, faded brown rug, the tall, sinuous-looking woman takes a deep and noticeable breath. The pinched nerve, shooting spasms of pain along the span of her back, is an irksome inconvenience–she has already had to reschedule a client.
At first glance, Revathy appears somewhat androgynous. A dramatic-looking lady in her Saree, she looks like either an incredibly handsome woman or an ingeniously talented drag queen. Her ample chest, tucked into a maroon Blouse, seems at odds with straight hips and a sensuous voice as gruff as gravel dragged through the mud.
At 39 years old, Revathy has seen it all. Her face lends several clues. Wrinkles gather around a generous mouth used to chain-smoking, insults, begging for dope.
Revathy is still a working girl, a working woman, a semi-retired escort in Bangalore who pulls tricks, a professional who, quite frankly, enjoys her job. She started in her “20s” and, some four decades later. She is as much on her game as any woman who has built a skill set over a lifetime. What is more, her expertise attracts young men.
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“In Mumbai, I got INR 20,000/ one night. That was cool,” she says casually. Revathy took the city of Mumbai to court last year after the police wrongfully strip-searched her. She won and took a vacation on the settlement. “He was in his 30s and cute. We put on a couple of videos, lay on the bed massaged each other, had sex, and that was it. It was nice.”
In Bangalore, Revathy came across several brothels specifically for older
escorts in Bangalore “I met a 70-year-old hooker when I was in Bangalore,” she says, her voice lowering in admiration.
“She was fine, you know, 70 years old. Not bad.” At 39, Revathy does not exactly forget the age thing–she knows she is slowing down. However, not one to cater to expectations, she simply sees ageing as a better business. “Older or mature female escorts in Bangalore can talk, we can get a conversation going, and we are willing to spend the time,” she says. “Some guys want mature women who are not going to rip them off. So there is an advantage both ways.”
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IN Nandhni’s DAY, there were five times as many escorts in Bangalore in Mumbai as there are today. In early 2010, prostitutes were proficient teachers providing sexual initiation for young boys, who filled the local brothels on half days and holidays. A great way, it could be said, to spend a kid’s lunch money.
She is coming from Mumbai, a place where the sexy older woman historically exists. Nandhini, a somewhat gamine, 52-year-old escort,
has that dry English wit that lends an intellectual twist to her musings.
Becoming an escort in Bangalore at 22, Nandhini saw her career change as a political move. When she picks up the telephone, a harsh, morning voice, deepened by nicotine, greets her, requesting to phone her back–on a dime.
“I think what age gives you, regardless of what you do, is grounding wisdom and acceptance of human foibles,” she says. “I do not think age is a disability. Of course, wish looked 20 years younger, but have gained other things.” Those “other things,” professionally speaking, as Nadhini touts them in her online ad on caigslist.com, are giving “joy, integrity and compassion” to her clients. Alternatively, as Nandhini puts it in person, “being older, sexier and very, very good.”
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Nandhini heartily admits to having lots of practice. Her initial training came during the 2004s, a time when the maxim “Nice girls do not” was replaced by the liberating mantra “Yes they do, and they like it, too.” “The first quality of a good whore is [determining], ‘Were you a good slut?’” Nandini says. Her answer is apparent after hitting 15 with a great pair of legs, just as the pill and the Chudhidhar into widespread use. “Yes! Moreover, it was damned good at it!”
Nandhini’s ad, which caught the attention of many clients, Nandhini says. “Men want to be good lovers, but in a relationship, everything is fully loaded. It is like, get pussy, but then have to spend the day with the mother-in-law. Offered men get a chance to learn.” A healthy contingent of young men eagerly responded to Nandhini’s ad.
Nandini admits she is always pleasantly surprised that younger men find her sexually attractive. Moreover, her time with them makes her appreciate what an older woman can give: experience. “Men think they supposed to like young, blond and bouncing,” she says. “I hear from younger guys, who are almost ashamed, that say they do not know why but they have always found older women attractive.” Nandhini begins to laugh slyly. “I tell them that means you are brilliant.”
While declining the services of a 50-year-old escort in Bangalore donning a Mami’s outfit, as “it was not [his] scene,” he has slept with one whose age hovers around 40. “I would be just as happy with an older one. Older and mature female escorts in Bangalore are comfortable with their career. Do not get the feeling of abusing them,” he says.
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Generally, he finds that less attractive prostitutes tend to be more skilled in the technique. “The less attractive, usually the more attentive,” he says. Not that age necessitates a lack of beauty, but in prostitution, looks are not what is for sale. Sex is.
Paradoxically, within the parallel industry of SEX, age is a bonus. Malini, a 27-year-old professional dominatrix, has found her clientele increasing as she heads toward 30. “Successful women in Bangalore are matured escorts in Bangalore whose expertise is appreciated and sought after by clients,” she says. Malini lies about her age because the appearance of authority amplifies the experience. Moreover, influence equates with age. “It is interesting, in this society that disempowers women who are ‘too old’ to be sexual, that I would find myself presenting myself as older,” she says.
Malini, who is a graduate student, puts a decidedly academic spin on sex work and how an older mature female escort in Bangalore challenges society’s perception of it.
She explains that in India, we tend to assign younger women victim status. Assuming that they are too young to make their own decisions–especially when it comes to engaging in prostitution.
However, when we see an older woman doing this work, it is more subversive. “Everything told about sex work–that it is demeaning to women and always forced–is contradicted by a woman in her 40s or 50s,” Malini says. “At that age, the lady is supposed to be professional and make the right choice.”
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As a community, we stand at a time when the course of our lives has gone beyond marrying and reproducing, straight to death.” We have to stop equating ageing with dying,” says Mrs. Sowmya, who sees old age as an outstanding phenomenon populated by pioneers with no social script. “What we have done in the last 100 years is to create a new life stage. We have added 30 years of life expectancy in a century,” she says. “Our culture created old age–in terms of the species, this is brand new.”
As far as older women are concerned, Mrs. Sowmya discovered that women find ageing liberating. “They do not worry so much about turning heads, or is their makeup just right,” she says. While the initial transition into losing one’s looks is difficult, “old women do not give a hoot. Once, it has gone, forgets about it,” she says. “But women do stay sexually active.”
Seeing women pursuing sex into old age challenges the traditional vision that consigns women to Biryani Cooking grandmas. It is a vision that counters the reality of many older women, including that of a local lady who remains nameless, is in her early 50s and typically dates younger men. Describing herself as “still attractive enough to be intriguing,” she says her younger lovers prize her for having the kind of sensuality that comes with wisdom and experience. “They expect an older mature female escort in Bangalore to know what she wants. She does not have the same fears as a younger woman about acceptance,” she says.
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Mrs.Sowmya recently posted a personal ad seeking a younger lover and the responses just tumbled in. “I have always fantasized about being with an older mature female escort in Bangalore. Ever since was barely old enough to have dirty thoughts,” reads one response. “To this day, my greatest fantasy remains unfulfilled.”
Nandhini finds younger men, too, are stretching their roles. “Young men in their 20s are much looser; they are less concerned with macho considerations,” she says. “There is much less front, and they are open to the idea of learning–this not seen as a failure.”
Long gone are the days when brothels were tolerated as cafes. Men said that “nature moved them to go to sport,” older mature female escorts in Bangalore, seems, are still initiating the young.
If anything, Malini’s recent experience while shopping underlines the point, that Malini across a rack of T-shirts in the wardrobe, had a conversation with a mother, who had her teenage daughter in tow. The mother, half-joking, said she had a couple of young boys and would love to send them to Malini when they were older. “I thought, ‘She has got it, there is no shame here,’” Maini says. The two women laughed because such a gesture would cost the mother custody of her children and Malini her freedom, but the sentiment was real.
“I think it is becoming the new fashion to date an older mature female escort in Bangalore,” Malini says, exhaling on her cigarette.
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